I Have The Past
by HumidityDidIt
Summary: The day of a wedding should be a time for happiness and joy, yet for one person it is a reminder of the past and a future that will never be. There is a HEA, but you must read til the end. Rating is only for a whole bunch of cursing. This is a one-shot that can turn into multiple chapters if there is any interest in this story.


**AN:** I am currently doing some edits on You Were Gone, But I Never Forgot. The goal is to post tonight or tomorrow. I'm honestly just not happy with Chapter Nine so I'm trying to fix it. For now, please enjoy this one-shot I may turn into a short few chapters later... It's OC and kinda AU as I changed a few things about the JE world to fit my story better.

 **Warning:** This will have some cursing. And please stick it out til the end before you get upset or throw fictional popcorn at me.

 **Disclaimer:** Wait for it...NOPE! Still not mine.

* * *

To say I was shocked when I learned about _her_ would be a vast understatement.

I always knew he told me we could not have a relationship and with my own uneasiness of commitment on some levels it made sense. I was afraid he would hurt me and with me now sitting in a pew watching as she walks down the isle into the life I deserve I hate her.

She took him from me before we even had a chance to try for a someday.

I want to jump out of my seat and strangle her. Watch her perfectly curled hair get ruined and wipe that fucking grin off her face. It's as if she's mocking me.

Stupid me for believing his bullshit.

"Why am I even here Les?" I whisper to Lester out of the side of my mouth once she's moved past our pew.

Lester looks at me with sympathetic eyes and gently squeezes my leg. He has turned out to be the only one of our well, his friends, who has still stayed close to me once it came out they were together.

I remember the day I walked into Haywood and my life ended as I knew it. I had suspected something when he stopped dropping by my apartment and making late night visits. Going on dates wasn't either of our styles which made it so much more convenient for him to easily slip into her life. Apparently the rumors I heard about her off and on over the years were true.

Under no circumstances did I ever imagine I would not have my happily ever after. Regardless of my own terrible, or callous choices in my personal life.

"You are his friend and colleague," Les reminds me as his eyes drift back to the front of the church. Carlos had asked Tank and Bobby to serve as Best Man and Groomsman. She had asked two of her friends I had seen in passing for her part of the wedding party.

"I was his friend Lester," I bluntly told him, bitterness stinging me.

I want to hate him too, but he looks wonderful in his tailored Armani suit which accents his physique and his hair is loose giving his sex appeal an unneeded boost. His slight smile says the most about how he feels about this.

As the priest begins the vows my mind drifts back to that faithful day over three years ago...

 _I assumed he was going in the wind again after he began to pull away from me. This was not an uncommon occurrence while he was preparing for a mission and I understood Ranger's motives when he stopped jumping into bed with me._

 _After a month of no late night rendezvous or returned calls I decided to take the Ranger by the horns and go to the office. I had worked as a contractor off and on which meant I had a parking space and fob. I was startled to see another vehicle I didn't recognize in my spot when I approached the Trenton office._

 _"No big deal," I told myself as I grabbed the last available space near the fleet vehicles and fobbed my way up to the control center._

 _When I stepped off the elevator I was stunned to see him there with another woman. I had recognized her from descriptions I had heard, but to see him with his arm around her waist and her settled against him unnerved me. For years, everyone suspected Ranger and I were more than coworkers and now I was replaced._

 _I almost spoke to him until she said something I didn't catch and he responded with a slight shake of his head and when he spoke I felt my throat constrict._

 _He called her **Babe.  
**_  
 _That one word annihilated my dream of us._

 _I quickly left the office that day and avoided making any future contact with him. It was my own damn fault for deciding to show him up in his territory. I found out she started doing distractions for Rangman and I quietly faded away from their lives._

 _Lester came to my apartment a few weeks later in one of my less than glorious moments when I decided to drown my misery in Crown with a shot of Coke for good measure._

 _"Hey Lester," I slurred as I let him in. i tried to appear to be only buzzed and would have been more successful if I hadn't walked into my kitchen counter as i tried to fix my next drink._

 _"Don't you think you've had enough?" He asked around a laugh as he helped me to my couch. I attempted to watch him as he grabbed two bottles of water from my refrigerator. I admired his ass and wondered where the hell I went wrong with Ranger._

 _"Drink this," Lester ordered as he shoved one of the bottles into my hand._

 _"Look," Lester began and I focused on swallowing, "I try to stay out of Carlos' personal shit but this time I can't. I'm sorry. If it makes you feel any better none of us knew about her or that he was serious about her until recently. With you not being around much we all kinda thought..."_

 _"You assumed he'd ended whatever we were," I finished for him. At Les' nod I felt the first tears fall._

* * *

"You may now kiss the bride," The priest's words pull me from my musings as the happy couple leave the church as husband and wife.

I numbly follow the crowd to the reception with Lester close behind me. I pull on my own version of the blank face and try to prepare myself to watch their first dance. Luckily for me, Lester soon came back with two champagne flutes and he gave both to me without a word.

Three glasses later I was starting to enjoy the music and began to consider asking one of the possible single men wondering around to dance when I noticed the newly weds were nowhere in sight.

"They cut out a few minutes ago," Lester quietly told me as he took my hand in his and led me to the dance floor.

Three songs later i finally had the nerve to ask Lester what I had been thinking about for almost three years after Ranger betrayed me for the Bombshell Bounty Hunter.

"Do you think I'll ever find happiness Les?" I quietly ask him, barely looking into his gorgeous green eyes.

"Jeanne," Lester began quietly, and at the sound of my name I cast a quick glance at him, "I think you deserve it and after your pride and ego heal; you'll be ready for it," At the end he twirled her lightly and spun her closer to him, causing her heart to beat faster.

* * *

AN: Alright, that's a wrap for now guys and gals unless you all want a continuation. I'm not sure how many people care to see a Jeanne story, but I actually like her character and I've always wanted to explore her and Ranger's past...Review and if y'all like it I would love to keep this going. But for now I must return to my other story because Carlos is not happy that I've been away so long...Thanks for reading!

Ren


End file.
